Roll up roll up and audition for the Grantomime
This year's Grantomime is going to have a PC theme. (That's politically Correct-not computery).
Also-rather than apportioning roles to all and sundry it will have an "organic" feel to it with people just contributing as and when they see fit.
So without further ado...I am proud to announce that on December the first the curtain will rise on..
SNOW-CAUCASIAN AND THE SEVEN PERSONS OF RESTRICTED GROWTH.
In this version the PORGS will be called "dignity" "hug-a-hoodie" "allergic" "slightly-offish" "more-right-brainy-than-left-brainy" "dyslxically dyspraxic" and "Ocd ".
The Prince and Snow-caucasian will only get together if both are comfortable with it, and if he chooses to be gay then that's OK with us.
The Wicked Witch will no longer be a wicked witch but a Misunderstood follower of Wicca and the Pagan Arts.
You get the picture...
To audition to be part of this wonderful and inspiring chef d'oeuvre you must let me know, in this thread, why you think you should be part of the team and prove how PC you are...hehehehehehe
Over to you. let the auditions commence.
* This Post Has Been Modified *
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at 11/4/07 5:15:16 AM
Ummm.....just a quick question...but...um.... if anyone can contribute and there are no set roles....why audition?!
Now.....How PC am I?
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
ONE, THANKYOU!
at 11/4/07 5:37:49 AM
> Ummm.....just a quick question...but...um.... if anyone can
> contribute and there are no set roles....why audition?!
> Now.....How PC am I?
> How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
> ONE, THANKYOU!
Because it's da roolz!(It builds up suspense etc over November and gives us something to do over the closed season. So stop asking awkward question and co-operate or else I'll send the team of lesbian stage managers to come and duff you up.)
Your audition was successful. You are now a member of the creative team.
I have to say Fraser that I attempted to make a film with similar concepts last year.. but ran into difficulties:
Hence these words of warning:
If you choose to base this visual delight at Blackpool Pleasure Beach like I did then be aware that The Gold Mine is only available for the vertically challenged actors to sing Hi Ho in at various times of the day.
I turned up with my cast and camera at the park's opening time only to be told by an employee that The Gold Mine was closed.
I asked why and he replied: "Short Staff"
Not to be deterred I thought I would shoot the final scene first..
My idea called for the vertically challenged to experience the thrills of being chased by a wicked witch on a gigantic roller coaster in the film's exciting climax but due to ride height restrictions I was allowed only 5 mins filming my cast sitting in the first few carriages on The Zipper Dipper with Bradley Beaver at the back.
As a result of this experience I would be willing to lend my invaluable expertise to this worthwhile project in whatever way I can..For instance
Should there be any holes in the plot due to the experimental nature of this concept, I would be happy to let you know where you can find any of the red tape you require.
I am a firm believer in upholding the laws of this wonderful nanny state of ours - Yes..All you posters out there who don't practice your archery on a Sunday and those of you who beat your carpet clean after 8am - You are all breaking laws that still exist in this country and should be brought to book!
Besides, if I pass Fraser's audition and it all goes horribly wrong it will be someone else's fault anyway.
at 11/4/07 8:48:45 AM
How politically correct am I? Very.
* I enjoyed the first series of Robin Hood.
* I'd like a Harry Potter spin-off - "Dumbledore: the Hogwarts Years".
* I believe the UK's New-For-2008 rides are extremely worthwhile.
I'll leave it at that before I get myself into trouble!
at 11/5/07 2:45:18 AM
Messrs Radice and Cassidy welcome to the PC fold.
I'm disappointed that you're not doing Harry Botter and the Prisoner of Asskaban!
at 11/8/07 7:48:43 AM
I've thought of three good jokes already! :D
> I've thought of three good jokes already! :D
Mr C..With these alone you have got yourself a summer season at Blackpool's North Pier Theatre!
at 11/8/07 3:35:35 PM
>> I've thought of three good jokes already! :D
> Mr C..With these alone you have got yourself a summer
> season at Blackpool's North Pier Theatre!
I'd love to, but I'm booked at Clacton. ;)
at 11/9/07 3:51:46 AM
Come on guys...I need your audition pieces...lest there be no Grantomime.
Cal- are you capable of being PC????
at 11/10/07 11:48:54 AM
Already that time of year, I am putting together an audition, but it's got to be classy, since it's PC...
'What does a blonde say when she's flirting? 'I'm drunk!' Oh wait, that's not very PC is it...
'I look forward to the announcement of Thorpe's flyer...'
Tim.
'Graeme is not King Wuss....
'Relocated coasters are just as much fun...'
at 11/22/07 1:10:22 PM
Announcer: So here's the girl you all came to see, please give a warm hand to the star of Robb & Elissa's wedding night tapes parts 6 and 9 . . . Intamin The Slut
Intamin The Slut: Good evening gentlemen and obstacles to those gentlemen, my name is Intamin The Slut, hell I've been a naughty girl all of my life, but I can't help having OCD . . . I've also had Dignity, Slightly-offish, Allergic, Dyslxically Dyspraxic and More-right-brainy-than-left-brainy, well I do believe in equal opportunities.
But I'd like to put all those behind me now, because I think the right man is about to come into my world (shouting up to Prince's window) hey you up there, I've been trying to grab your attention for years now . . . .
special
when you need something new
i can make your coaster
special
when attendance is blue
let me make your coaster
special
for a million or two
your parks a bore
that's flagging each day
no one likes your core
ride compliment today
being a vekoma whore
has a price to pay
but you can go a more
sensational way
with me
(yeah they're real)
when we're together
the supports will shake
the launches roll back
and the cables will break
so come on baby
fill in your carpark or yard
when B&M aren't looking
i'll slip you my card
i can tell just be looking
that the fanboys have got it hard
for me! for me!
for me! for me!
i can tell just by looking
that the fanboys are especially
hard for me
at 11/22/07 3:22:30 PM
Spectacular!
at 11/23/07 4:32:28 AM
Loving your Avenue Q pastiche. You get to become producer.
I like Sesame Street - I remember the first ever episode - Mr Hooper and Big Bird was in it - I'm 46 today - Don't worry - Whenever I'm in need of a smile I read Fraser's verse (See link)
...can I be editor in chief? :-)
at 11/23/07 3:45:10 PM
> I like Sesame Street - I remember the first ever episode -
> Mr Hooper and Big Bird was in it - I'm 46 today - Don't
> worry - Whenever I'm in need of a smile I read Fraser's
> verse (See link)
Happy Birthday Gary! 46 years young!
I still love reading Fraser's "The Coaster at Great Yarmouth" (to the tune of The Holly and the Ivy).
PC moi? Don't be silly, Fraser!
